Saturday's Intellectual Candy: Lady in the Bag

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Lady in the Bag

Scribe:  Lady in the Bag

Email:  lady@thethinkering.com

 

MUSLIMS, JEWS, MORMANS LGBTQ UNITE NOW

Be an independent thinker and question everything; make no assumptions; investigate; register to vote and VOTE.    BOOM!   Drop the Mike!   People will attempt to dissuade you from questioning and pursuing investigation. Ha! You know better! Now read the information below and figure out what you can do to help, put reason back into the People’s Whitehouse. At least Trump has not, as of yet, plastered his name on the front door. 

The new American Embassy (Embassy) is now located in Jerusalem; the Israelis celebrated this move from Tel Aviv, while the Palestinians decried it. At the opening ceremony, the prayer was delivered by Evangelical Pastor Robert Jeffress, of Dallas, Texas; and the closing benediction by Reverend John C. Hagee, of San Antonio, Texas, a televangelist, and founder of Christians United for Israel.  

Pastor Jeffress and Rev. Hagee over their tenure as clergy made comments and remarks that were racially and sexually charged and religiously exclusive (only evangelical Christians saved). Their remarks included the following comments verbally and in writings, namely:  You are going to hell:  Jews are going to hell and Hitler (killed in excess of six million Jews) was part of God’s plan to return Jews to Israel and Jews can’t be saved according to Peter, Paul and Jesus; anti-Muslin sentiment is revealed: Islam is wrong, heresy from the pit of hell: Those living by the Quran have scriptural mandate to kill Jews and Christians and 200 million Muslims want to come to America or Israel in order to crush it; anti-LGBTQ comments: preach hard enough, you can cure this scourge that is upon us;: Hurricane Katrina made landfall in New Orleans as G-d’s punishment for a gay pride parade and the city’s sinful ways; Mormonism is wrong, a heresy from pit of hell, not Christianity, a cult    :  Hinduism leads people to eternity in  separation from G-d.

Both Evangelical Christian religious leaders played prominent roles at Monday’s opening ceremony, of the new American Embassy in Jerusalem. How inclusive were these clergy? Why sanctify the Embassy and fail to explain to the American people the reasons that the Embassy was relocated? Yeah! Why? OK! You cannot simply say: because I said so. We are not to be toyed with and expect answers from our leaders.

These two pastors, Evangelicals, believe that Jerusalem and Israel are an integral part of the biblical prophecies of the second coming of Christ; as such, they were enthusiastic about the Embassy’s relocation. King Bonespur Trump decided to move the Embassy, since the move was a campaign promise made to hardline Christian voters. The pastors believe that King Bonespur Trump stands with them on the right side of G-d. 

As feared by some, this move completely destabilized the region and resulted in erosion of seven decades of United States policy.  Both Israelis and Palestinians claim Jerusalem as their capital. Muslims claim Jerusalem as the seat of their religion. As anticipated, mass protests broke out merely hours before the embassy opening.  Rev. Hagee, when discussing Islamic terrorism, said, “Let every Islamic terrorist hear this message: ‘Israel lives.’” 

King Bonespur Trump never went to war despite being called to service multiple times, via the draft, since he was deemed 4 F (failed to pass medical examination due to bonespurs) unless you count his wars waged against old, infirm and handicapped  tenants in order  to evict them from their apartments, and enable conversion into condos.  Of note is that fact that King Bonespur Trump is allegedly the healthiest president in the world. WHAT HAPPENED TO THE BONESPURS??? They healed. HEE! HEE! HAHA!

Please continue to send XXXL Pampers and Depends to the People’s Whitehouse, since they have a growing daycare program!  Don’t let the BAD guys win. VOTE BABY VOTE! MARCH BABY MARCH! BE HEARD AND SEEN! TAKE CONTROL OUT OF THE HANDS OF FOLKS WHO LIE AND DECIEVE YOU AND DON”T CARE ABOUT YOU; THEY JUST WANT YOUR VOTE! 

 

By The Lady in the Bag

 

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